Tuesday, 30 June 2009

Hi Jacked

Got a call from Jack today. He was sitting in his car having lunch and thought he would ring me to have a chat whilst i was on my lunch break.

Nice thought, but i was out with Rachel in a cafe at the time and i had a choice, ignore her and chat to him for 30 minutes, or fob him off and sound like i don't want to speak to him.
Rachel being Rachel, all this was taken out of my hands because she hijacked the phone to introduce herself and then took the opportunity to quiz him on everything about himself.

So there was i sat in silence listening to both of them chatting away with her doing her investigative journalist routine.
When she reached the part where she was asking him what i am like in bed i snatch the phone back and took charge again. After the call and in retaliation i started asking intimate details about her new boyfriend.
The great thing about Rachel is that she has no shame and will answer any question asked. Apparently he is very good in bed, has a big one and has a tongue that would make a snake proud.

'it's one of those willies that look really big but doesn't grow much. it just gets harder. My last boyfriends was tiny when soft, then got big later, so i nearly shit myself when i saw his in the beginning, i thought that'll be huge when it grows up'

After we had finished chatting and i was about to go back to work she once again left me with a short sentence that left me laughing to myself all afternoon.

'Yesterday i had a Cornish pasty for my lunch and i must have dropped most of it down my cleavage because when i took my bra off last night half the bloody thing fall out from between my tits. I thought i had a skin complaint the amount of shit there was, talk about saving it for later..'.


naturgesetz said...

I take it hijacking the phone isn't the same as fonejacking — gooood afternoon sir, we need your bank information so we can transfer the monies.

Mambam said...

LOL, no and it's also completely different to jacking on the phone.

Anonymous said...

Jacking on the phone?

gone on - call me!