Friday, 30 July 2010

Get well too soon

Daniel came over yesterday.
He seems a lot happier now, but he tends to be able to put things behind him a little quicker than is healthy I think.
It’s always been the way. One minute he’s suicidal over something, but when you help him out by sorting it for him he forgets about it almost immediately and is super happy again instantly.
He’s not putting it on, he really is depressed and really does feel happy again. But the change is too quick for my liking.
I don’t think he realises that his financial problems are only just beginning and that there hasn’t just been a quick fix.
Mark my words, in a months time he’ll be all depressed again when he realises that for the next five years he’ll be paying off his debts on top of his normal bills.

On the plus side, he’s lost a bit of weight with all the stress and worry and looks as fit as fuck all of a sudden. LOL.
We were both laughing about it.
There are upsides to no food and sleepless nights.

One of my bosses can be really annoying when it comes to leaving the office for a meeting or to visit a customer.
He'll tell you he is going, but 20 minutes later he's still pissing about making calls and sorting things out.
Not because they need to be done there and then. In fact he's probably spent the past 3 hours doing bugger all. But for some reason all those little jobs need doing just before he goes somewhere.
He can do more work in that half an hour before leaving the office than he's done all day. Then he'll go for a piss, ask if anyone needs anything whilst he's out, make another quick call, tell you he’s going again for the 12th time, start talking to someone, read a bit of the front page of a newspaper that someone has left lying around in the canteen, ask again if anyone needs anything. rings the person he's going to visit to say that he's on his way, gets involved in another piece of work whilst he's still at his desk, and so it goes on.
Sometimes he'll piss about for so long that he'll eventually say that it's too late and wont bother going at all.
This has nothing to do with me, doesn’t effect my work and is just something that goes on in the background whilst I’m busy. It matters not one iota to me whether he stays or goes..
So why does it piss me off so much that after about an hour of this I just wanna scream "WILL YOU JUST FUCK OFF !"

Thursday, 29 July 2010

DJ on the Radio Blog

I've just finished reading a book by Simon Garfield called The Nations Favourite.
If you live outside the UK it would probably be a bit of a meaningless read for you because it's the true story of a famous and popular UK BBC Radio Station going through a huge change from it's staid old fashioned DJs and music of the past through to supposed young trendy audience and Jocks of the future.
It's quite funny in parts and interesting if you know the people it writes about, but the thing that amused me the most was the backstabbing self opinionated prima donna behaviour of DJs who, lets face it, just talk for a living in between playing other peoples music.

For some reason some of them actually thought that the nation waited with baited breathe for the words they spouted every day in between Billy Joel and the Beach Boys. And many couldn't understand why they couldn't still be playing music on a station aimed at 15 to 25 year olds, even though they were now in their 60s.
But any time i've ever met a DJ they always turned out to be a tosser anyway. I nearly went out with one once who worked in a pub in Bury. Then i saw him playing one night and couldn't get over the fact that he spoke with an American accent on the mic.
The final straw came when he told a joke and it fell flat. you could practically see the tumbleweed blowing past as he slapped a record on quick to cover his embarrassment.

Then i think to myself, isn't that what this blog is anyway?. Someone elses pictures instead of music but still with me waffling away about any old shite in between.
Am i a tosser ?. Well i'm definitely a Wanker i can confirm that analogy for a start. :-)).

But i think I'd like to be a DJ. How much hard work could that be?.

It's 4.23 on a warm Thursday afternoon here in the UK and your reading the Mambam Blog. Earlier on i'll be writing about a fat smelly man with black socks and well be looking at some gay erotica that bares no relevance to the blog postings attached.
But for now... heres a picture of a half naked man by Ev Dylan.
Fffffwwwwooooooorrrr !!!

Wednesday, 28 July 2010

Older Gay Fat men

After a great June we've now settled back into a typical English summer. Pissing it down every 5 minutes and Cloud all over the place.
But it's also warm so your caught between getting wet and feeling cool or sweating your arse off but covering up.
I wished i lived somewhere else.
I imagine hot country's with hot guys walking around half naked. But the reality is probably fatties in tight T Shirts.

On Saturday i went to the Supermarket and there was a huge sweaty scruffy man looking through a bargain bin full of DVDs. He was about 30ish, unshaven, dirty finger nails and hair down to his shoulders (even though he was bald on top). he wore a stained Def Leppard T-shirt that hardly covered his belly, Had jeans that sagged round his bum, black socks, slipper (?) and the hairiest arms and ears i've ever seen on a man.
Worse still he stunk to high hell and i wasn't even walking past him, i was at least three feet but the pong still managed to hit me. He can't have had a wash in 6 months, and with all the hot weather and all....
Yuk !. You wouldn't wanna be rummaging round in his underpants thats for sure. LOL. Anyways the reason i say this is because i know someone who really goes for big men. OK, he's a bit of a chubby chap himself, but he's actually got a bit of a fetish for older fat guys with beards (his words not mine).
I wonder what he would have thought of this guy ?. Imagine sucking on his toes...
BBBBBBlllllleaaaark !!!!! I think i'm gonna be sick.

Tuesday, 27 July 2010

Computer Back up and running

No time to blog, I'm testing my repaired and rejuvenated computer now that it's back in it's rightful place, on the unit, in the front room, 6 feet away from the telly that's playing in the background.
God I've missed you. Never ever go away again you little bastard.
Now then, where were we before we were so rudely interrupted.....

Monday, 26 July 2010

Dick Tate

My computer has gone down on me (i wish) . So thats why im phone blogging but im getting it back tomorrow after all the porno viruses are cleaned off my hard drive.

Got a new app for my phone today called dictation. It's a voice recognition program where you just speak and it types it out for you.
So to try it out the next bit is copied direct from that.

"As I dictated this blog entry I'm driving home from work the problem with dictating a blog entry instead of typing it is that you've got to think about what you want to say otherwise you end up with a warm air and Andy Cole comes out gobbledygook whereas when you type out the blog entry you can think about what you're going to say as you go along and collect things easily on the other hand it will be interesting to see whether it can translate the words shaped fork bollocks and hairy moles"

It doesn't really work does it ?

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Friday, 23 July 2010

Lasagne sandwich ! Why ?

Yuk !!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Thursday, 22 July 2010

Sexual positions

Whats the best thing about screwing a guy?When you reach around you think you've gone all the way through.

That was An SMS text message joke sent to me today by a friend.

Probably because I'm the only gay person she knows.
I didn't reply because I didn't have my phone with me at the time and was busy working anyway so I hadn't read it yet.

Then I got another text message later asking if i thought it was offensive.

And later still a call to say sorry for sending it.

Bloody he'll some women are paranoid.

Besides I don't do reach around, I like to be face to face. Hetero people have one image of gay men having sex and it's rarely the way I screw.

I know one gay friend who will not and never has had anything up his arse.
And Daniel once told me he's not a big fan of testicles LOL.

To late now boy. Chin up.

- Posted using BlogPressfrom my iPhone

Wednesday, 21 July 2010

Phone sex

At the top end of my satellite receiver there are dozens of porn channels and a string of phone sex shows where you get some topless slapper sat with a phone in here hand trying to entice a hapless guy to part with £1.50 a minute whilst wacking of & chatting to her about dirty knickers or something.

I'll never understand why, not just from a gay point of view, more for the £1.50 a minute point of view.

I don't see any queer versions of it, probably cos you could find millions of gay men willing to talk filth for free anywhere you like.

In fact if you think about it you can probably get someone to have gay sex for free easily and anyone looking to make a porn film would get a string of men willing to perform for zilch as long as you weren't fussed about looks or hygiene.

It's a wonder male prostitution still exists in this day & age. Gaydar is the napster of the rent boy world me thinks.

Anyway the reason I write this is because I've been pissing myself laughing at what women think is sexy for men.
Talking in a deep raspy voice and bobbing up and down grinning like a mad woman at the camera. Heterosexuality makes laugh sometimes.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Tuesday, 20 July 2010

Scruff bags

Phone blogging for a bit. It might not look pretty but its words.

Thanks for your comments by the way. I do hear you and will take your advice. I just can't work out how to reply to comments via my phone yet.

I'm single again by the way.
To much time spent on sorting Daniel out and not enough on him. In the end he found someone else to screw. Or should that be he found someone else to screw him.
That reminds me of the most cutting put down I ever heard from a mate dumping his boyfriend.

"you were getting a bit slack anyway" ouch!

I've been on gaydar a bit as well to drowned my sorrows. All I get are fellas in their 40s.
Not actually taken the plunge mind you. I'm still listed as living in Manchester so anyone interesting is miles away.
I'm told I should try grindr for my mobile but I'm only flirting and looking for cheap thrills. The fact that guys live too far away makes me think again. If I could see someone online who lived 100 yards away I might not think before I leap.
Saw a guy in the shop this week who looked as fit as fuck. As he walked past I got a really bad whiff of BO.
He stunk. There is a downside to hot weather. I felt like chasing after him and sticking some deodorant in his pocket.

Beauty and cleanliness don't always seem to go hand in hand. Some of the prettiest people I know are scruffy bastards.
you imagine smelly old men and fresh clean you guys but from my experience it's usually the other way round. (not that I've had any old men).

Monday, 19 July 2010

Quick Update to the update

I have a few minutes spare, so for anyone who still looks in on this blog i thought i would let you know what happened.

The guy was ok in the end. In fact he seemed to make a bit of a miraculous recovery from what i hear. which seems strange because one minute they are making out he's in serious condition, the next he's out of hospital. WTF ?. You don't get better that quick surely ?.
He doesn't wanna press charges or take things further for three reasons. 1. he was a bit of a twat and well known to the police, so, neither he nore his family wanna say anything. 2 he's also on some sort of parole after being involved in a violent incident himself in the not to distant past. and 3. Getting battered by a queer doesn't help your street cred very much.
It's not as simple as all that of course because the police are already involved and you can't just tell them to forget it and lets all pretend it never happened shall we ?. I know no more because i haven't spoken to Daniel about it for weeks now. It's sort of something he doesn't wanna talk about. So everything i have written above could be bullshit and he might be on the verge of being locked up with the bad men next week for all i know.

But as a side issue (not really) it has also come to light that Daniel is in massive debt. He's run up a few credit cards and owes thousands. I wouldn't mind but it's not as if he's got anything to show for it. The stupid twat. No big holidays, flash car, big house, cloths and jewelry for him. NO, this idiot just frittered it away on nothing. A night out here, a meal there, some new Jeans, Cheap Christmas or birthday presents for people. Maybe the odd DVD or some Shit off Ebay.
Then he pays the minimum on the card and it builds up from there. Its not as if i ever saw him flashing the cash. How did that ever happen ? It's thousands !.
Anyway with the help of his mum and dad, he's sorting this out with an IVA (individual Voluntary Arrangement) to pay it back sometime between now and forever.
They aint paying it for him, he is. so that's his life fucked for a few years. If he doesn't end up going to prison of course.

On one hand i feel sorry for him, on the other i'm really angry.
But probably not for the reason i should be.
I'm annoyed that i'm supposed to be his best mate and i didn't know. He didn't say anything to me and i never had a clue.
From a selfish point of view i feel like i've been lied to and considered less of a friend.
I know i'm not, but you get the idea. If you found out your best mate had a secret side to him that he never told you about, how would you feel ?.

Hang on a minute that last line touched a cord. !