Monday, 11 October 2010

Fantastic Disco Night

Well Saturday night was interesting to say the least. Absolutely nothing like the previous post. LOL. It was fucking brilliant though so i'm gonna drone on about it for a bit.

We picked up all the equipment in the afternoon and then got to this little club for about 7pm. It didn't start whilst 8 but he wanted to set up and have a drink to calm his nerves. I drove there so he was gonna drive back. Which meant i could have a drink myself after i had done the donkey work. He had far too many Records with him. Yes records. he had records. They weighed a bloody ton and most of the night all he did was put CDs on so why he wasted his time with that lot i don't know. We had enough music with us to play none stop for a decade but it's his gig not mine i suppose.

It was a mixed crowed of people who didn't really start arriving till about 9.30. Which put the wind up the woman whos 50th birthday it was. She, and we, thought no one was gonna come, so it was a relief when it got to about 10pm and the place was packed. By about 10.15 people were dancing and then they stopped everything to make a thank you speech which ruined the flow of things according to my uncle Chris.

Anyway they got going again at about 10.30 and that was it for the rest of the night, he went down a storm. I just wandered around talking to people and getting steadily merry. I can talk to any stranger when i've had a few so i was quite happy. There were a couple of people there that i vaguely knew anyway.

He was very much an old fashioned DJ with lots of talking that no one could really understand and playing things like Uptown Girl and  lots of Motown music. There was fuck all from anything in the last 20 years from what i could hear and then he ended off with some slow stuff like Spandau Ballet True.

A old lady slipped on some spilt beer on the dance floor and as she went down all the women went "wooooooooooo" in a high pitched shocked screech. But as someone went to help her she also slipped and that was followed by another high pitched "woooooooo" from everyone concerned that she was also gonna hurt herself Then as the old lady got up she skidded a bit and there was another "wooooooo" as all these women in unison displayed their shock and horror. It might not sound funny on paper but i had to leave the room i'm afraid i was pissing myself laughing and crying at the same time. It wasn't the women falling it was the "woooooooooo" that did it for me. They were dropping like flys to the soundtrack of old ladies going "woooooooooooo" as they fell. I'm laughing to myself as i type this. You had to be there.

But better was to come. All night long my uncle had been pestered by this woman who obviously fancied him. She hung around for hours and he bought her a few drinks. He was reliving his youth i think and this was turning out to be a great night for him.

When we had done he promised her a lift home in the van with me so we loaded up all the stuff as the place was closing and she just sat around. She was a pissed as a fart, but we didn't realise how pissed until we were ready to go. We couldn't find her anywhere. The guy behind the bar was turning off all the lights when we heard her cry from "help!".

She had decided to go for one last piss before we went home, on each side of the stage there was a toilet, One side Gents, the other Women's. But when she got to the door the lights were off. The barman had flicked the switch thinking everyone had gone home. So she decided to feel her way inside and take a piss. But when she got back up again she couldn't find the way back out again it was so dark. She was calling for help from inside.
Then to top it all ---And this is the bit that I've just spent the whole weekend wetting myself over -- My uncle went to push the door open to shine some light inside and free her, but she must have been just behind the door and it hit her in the face. As we carried her out and sat her on a chair to recover blood coming squirting out of her nose. And finally the icing on the cake came when she then threw up on my Uncle Chris and The barman (who was really pissed of at this point.
She was a mess. What a great night out eh?. I wonder if they will ever see each other again. LOL
Watch this space. When he gave me the £80 i nearly gave it him back for the fun of it all.
The most entertaining night i've had in ages.

1 comment:

naturgesetz said...

I'd almost be willing to be there for 80 quid.

Actually the part about all the women going "Woooooooo" is LOL-worthy.

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