I bought a 'finest' Aberdeen Angus cottage pie from Tescos for the dinner party tonight. I know it’s cheating but what the hell.
The guy behind the counter was a good-looking bloke in his early 20`s. Long hair and a bit spotty but very friendly.
When he gave me my change, instead of doing the robotic 'thank you for shopping at Tescos, have a nice day' type of thing. He dropped the coins in my hand and then said “cheers mate, nice one!" then stuck both thumbs up in the air like Paul McCartney does.
If I am honest it seemed much nicer and friendlier than the usual but as I walked a way I heard his supervisor ticking him off for doing it.
On the way to the car i passed a guy on his mobile talking really loudly (like they do). "listen mum" he said " Nathan was never gonna be the type of kid to come away with any A's or B's". Which reminded me to ring my cousin and ask how he did with his exam results yesterday.
He wasn't available to talk because he was in the bath. His dad said "He's going out to get pissed tonight to celebrate !"
To do the full cheat I have also got three packets of frozen microwavable veg and some Aunt Bessie's frozen Yorkshire Puddings that take 3 minutes to defrost in the oven. Then I have a huge tin of custard and a pack of 6 Mr Kiplin Apple pies to pour it on for afters.
My mum gave me some old plates that match and are at least all the same size and I bought a set of cheap knifes and forks from Wilkinsons.
Everyone I have spoken to today about having this dinner party thinks it's either funny or can’t understand why I don’t cook properly. But who cares, if it works this once maybe I’ll experiment on them next time. Who knows maybe one of them will be inviting me to their place for a meal next time. Hopefully not Daniel. According to his mum, he once put an unopened tin of beans in some boiling water to ‘cook it’.
Anyway we’re all set for a great night. I feel much better and I’m in the mood for a drink as well.
I'm all excited. Fingers crossed.
The guy behind the counter was a good-looking bloke in his early 20`s. Long hair and a bit spotty but very friendly.
When he gave me my change, instead of doing the robotic 'thank you for shopping at Tescos, have a nice day' type of thing. He dropped the coins in my hand and then said “cheers mate, nice one!" then stuck both thumbs up in the air like Paul McCartney does.
If I am honest it seemed much nicer and friendlier than the usual but as I walked a way I heard his supervisor ticking him off for doing it.
On the way to the car i passed a guy on his mobile talking really loudly (like they do). "listen mum" he said " Nathan was never gonna be the type of kid to come away with any A's or B's". Which reminded me to ring my cousin and ask how he did with his exam results yesterday.
He wasn't available to talk because he was in the bath. His dad said "He's going out to get pissed tonight to celebrate !"
To do the full cheat I have also got three packets of frozen microwavable veg and some Aunt Bessie's frozen Yorkshire Puddings that take 3 minutes to defrost in the oven. Then I have a huge tin of custard and a pack of 6 Mr Kiplin Apple pies to pour it on for afters.
My mum gave me some old plates that match and are at least all the same size and I bought a set of cheap knifes and forks from Wilkinsons.
Everyone I have spoken to today about having this dinner party thinks it's either funny or can’t understand why I don’t cook properly. But who cares, if it works this once maybe I’ll experiment on them next time. Who knows maybe one of them will be inviting me to their place for a meal next time. Hopefully not Daniel. According to his mum, he once put an unopened tin of beans in some boiling water to ‘cook it’.
Anyway we’re all set for a great night. I feel much better and I’m in the mood for a drink as well.
I'm all excited. Fingers crossed.
3 comments:
Well then, have a successful evening. :-) Propz Pilgrim
Have a great evening! But I'm going to have to teach you to cook, Michael - this British 'good food is for the upper classes or upper class wannabes' thing drives me utterly fucking insane. It's like saying it's pretentious to enjoy sex.
meal sounds good. I am sure they will appreciate all your trouble/money. You all ought to do this once a month at each others home and try the beans heated in the can... Sound real good...
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